September is international Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. I’ve been thinking about what I wish people knew from the perspective and experience of a suicide survivor.
I have lost family members and people close to me to suicide, witnessed a suicide, survived multiple suicide attempts, and now counsel others who are suicidal. I have very intimate knowledge and understanding of this very important topic.
It is by learning from people like me and others who have experienced suicidal thinking, ideation, and finally attempts that we can gain a deeper understanding of how to prevent it.
NUMBER 1
More people think about and ultimately act on suicidal thoughts than you think. Every 40 seconds, someone somewhere in the world dies by suicide. That’s over 2160 people every single day. Just shy of 800 000 people a year.
NUMBER 2
Asking someone whether they are feeling suicidal outright will not cause them to follow through on their plan. It could help them to open up and get the help they need. I wish someone had asked me this question during the times I had felt suicidal in the past.
NUMBER 3
Trying to make someone feel bad about themselves by accusing them of being selfish when feeling suicidal is not helpful at all. This is making it about yourself and your own feelings instead of helping the person who is in crisis.
You already feel like a failure when you’re in this state of despair. Added negativity just makes it worse.
NUMBER 4
Not only individuals who suffer from mental illness attempt or die by suicide. You can be perfectly healthy with no history of mental illness and find yourself in that dark place due to relationship problems, financial stress, experiencing trauma, or a myriad of other difficulties in life.
NUMBER 5
Wanting to end your own life has nothing to do with wanting to hurt those close to you. It is a desperate attempt to escape from a place of unbearable pain and hopelessness.
NUMBER 6
Warning signs are usually (not always) detectable beforehand. E.g. isolating, strange status updates, telling everyone you love them (saying goodbye), giving away possessions, suicide method search history, seeming cut off from emotions or in a state of despair, change in personality, joking about not wanting to be alive anymore or that nobody would notice if they were gone.
Paying attention to these kinds of clues can help identify suicidal thoughts or ideation early on.
NUMBER 7
Don’t try to ‘fix it’. What someone really needs more often than not when feeling suicidal is someone who will just sit with them and listen without judgment.
NUMBER 8
When you are actively suicidal, you cannot think rationally. Your brain and nervous system are completely overwhelmed. Expecting someone to make rational decisions in this state is like expecting a fish to climb a tree.
Kindness and empathy cost nothing and go a long way. It might just save someone’s life.
If you or anyone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, please reach out and talk to someone. Whether it be a friend, a family member, a colleague, a teacher, a free helpline, or a doctor.
If you are feeling suicidal you can go to your nearest emergency room. They are trained on how to handle these kinds of situations.
I want you to know that you are not alone and that there are caring, and understanding people out there who would love to help you overcome your current struggles. It takes a great deal of courage to reach out when you are in need of help. But I can promise you it’s worth it. ❤
If you would like to reach out to me you can do so via email by clicking HERE or visiting my website: www.jorust.com
